That's my Dawg

OK, so I have to be honest. I've been here in PA about 3 1/2 weeks. I'm lonely. I'm tired. It's late. I miss my dawg. For those of you who don't know me well, you may not know about my dawg...er, well, he's not really my dawg. He is my boss' dawg, except I quit that job to move to Philly, so now he's still a dawg. I guess he's my former boss' dawg.
Anyway, I loved that dawg. Still do. I've not been sleeping well since I've been out here, and seriously, when I'm laying in bed unable to sleep, the only thought that brings a smile to my face is the thought of my dawg sitting on my lap, or biting my nose. Let me tell ya a little something about him. His name is Spatzel. He's a Ger-man, his name a reference to some type of noodle. He kept me sane during this past tax season. I promise he loved me like a complete idiot. Every morning when I walked in the door he would run full speed ahead, slide on the tile, come to a halt at my feet, roll over on his back, wag his tail so hard that he'd wet himself...seriously, if I marry a woman who is half as excited to see me when i walk in the door...well, let's not get too carried away. Anyway, he's a miniature dachshund, probably weighs about 11 lbs. He's so stinkin sweet, like skateboarder sweet. Anyway, one time I wanted to test him - I really wanted to see where his affections lay - so, after my boss and his wife left one evening to go to a movie, I stuck around the office. Well, my dawg starting knawing on my hand really hard, telling me that he seriously wanted to show me who's boss. So, I seized the moment. I would always feign pain just to play with him, cuz he'd get more pumped up when he thought he was hurtin me. So, this time, I was really letting out some "owwwww's" and "Ohhhhhh's". And then I did it! He dug in really good and then I let out a pretty fierce cry of anguish, for a good 10-15 seconds. And Spatzel came through...He leaned back and howled-seriously-three times, and then he hit the intercom button on the phone and was getting ready to dial 9-1-1...OK, everything was true up to that last part. Anyway, then I grabbed him and lifted him over my head in triumph, and told what an awesome dawg he was...he didn't think it was too funny and he lunged at me and bit my nose. That's love.

So, it's later, I'm still tired, and still I don't have a dawg or a wife. But here's my ode, to the best darn dawg ever.

S Sleepin on my lap half the day
P Poopin on the floor made me giggle
A Anxiety slipped away when you were near
T Tail waggin incessantly
Z zero words come to mind that start with Z
E Eloquent is the language of your...
L Love

G'night all